Snippets from ‘Codename: Spazz’.

I’ve written a series of children’s stories called the SpyKat Tales and I figured I’d go ahead and let everyone read a few parts of the first story. This book is called ‘Codename: Spazz’, and like the rest of the books is based on the life of one of my cats. If you enjoy what you read, you can purchase the entire ebook (complete with pictures) here. There are a total of six books in the series and I’ll post snippets of the others at later dates. Enjoy.

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I blame my Human for not getting my first mission until I was five. I mean really, how are Sir Boots and Madame Princess supposed to take me seriously with a name like Spazz? Don’t get me wrong, I love my Human. She buys me treats, makes sure my bathroom is always clean and knows exactly where that spot is under my chin. Despite all her good traits, however, she’s obviously got some serious issues. Me a Spazz, as if.

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For the second time that day I found myself on my back, and while I usually wouldn’t have a problem with that, it’s my favorite position to sleep in after all, being held down by vines in the middle of the forest is extremely uncomfortable. How cats can live outdoors is a mystery to me. All those bugs, the disgusting dirt, and odd smelly plants…yuck.

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After she’d finished talking, most of which I tuned out, but don’t tell her that cause I’m sure she’ll tell HQ and then I’ll be in all sorts of trouble, she dropped her nose to the ground and began leading me deeper into the woods near my Human’s house. I have to admit it was a little scary, all those dark and imposing trees looming over me, but being the brave cat that I am I pressed on without incident…and if that ferret says anything otherwise, she’s lying! Lying I tell you! I did not scream like a little girl, or hide behind her when a spider crawled by!

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There I stood in the middle of what looked like a conference room, surrounded by about a hundred rats of various size and color, but that wasn’t the worst part. In the middle of the room, sitting on what looked like a pile of straw, was the head rat himself, Mr. Cheese. My whole body froze when the situation fully sank in and I’m ashamed to admit it, I even let out a small whimper in fear. Don’t judge me; you’d be scared too if you found yourself in the middle of a large group of the enemy…and you’d better not make any comment about how cats shouldn’t be afraid of rats since we’re so much bigger than them, remember, they had superior numbers.

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I thought about ducking back into the tree and making a mad dash for safety, and probably would’ve done so if my mother hadn’t looked up and stared straight into my eyes. My knees began to shake and I dropped my head when she gave me ‘the look’. You know the one that all parents use when their child has just done something incredibly stupid…yeah, that look. I heard one of the other SpyKats snickering off to the side and wished I could just disappear.

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Well there you have it, a taste of ‘Codename: Spazz’.

Later.

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